Wife Assuming Husband's Name

Assuming husband's name after marriage is a common practice among women across the world. Most of the Muslim women are not any different.

Muslim woman are not allowed to assume their husband's name. There are more than one evidence supporting this prohibition. Below link explains it in detail
http://www.islamqa.com/en/ref/6241

 In Islam your name is a big part of your identity. An Islamic name clearly says that the name holder is the son or daughter of so and so and father or mother of so and so. If you think assuming husband’s name is also similar to it, you might want to understand where this tradition came from. 

This tradition is associated more with ownership than the identity. In olden days the law in United Kingdom empowered the man to literally own his legally wed wife. Under the traditional English common law the status of a married woman is called "coverture".

A woman under the coverture status “could not own property, sign legal documents or enter into a contract, obtain an education against her husband's wishes, or keep a salary for herself. If a wife was permitted to work, under the laws of coverture she was required to relinquish her wages to her husband. In certain cases, a woman did not have individual legal liability for her misdeeds, since it was legally assumed that she was acting under the orders of her husband, and generally a husband and wife were not allowed to testify either for or against each other”.

Ruth Hale, the co-founder and the 1^st president of the Lucy Stone League, once commented that “man owned what he paid for, and could put his name on everything for which he provided money…he put on his land, his house, his wife and children.”

Spread the awarness among the Muslim sisters to retain their maiden names after marriage. Father of a person can not be changed but husbands can.

A Cup of Tea -Short Story

Every progressive step in the life of a child is a moment of joy for the mom. The mother from a small time town in this story  was not any different. She felt the tears when her son took his baby steps, went to school, graduated, got the first job... A few days back it was another moment of 'Joy' for her. Her son made the 1st cup of tea in his life.

He is now in his youth but has never tried to make a cup of tea in his life. In other way, his mother never gave him a chance... She never made him wait for the food, nor gave the chance to see the soiled cloths he throws up in the corner of his room getting piled up. She very occasionally used to complain about treating her favors to him as his rights and ignoring her requests to accompany her to the doctor for the check ups, but never stopped doing things for him.

She was reciting Quran after the Fajr prayer as usual on that weekend too. He usually comes to her room in the morning to asks her for the morning tea. Since it was a holiday she was not expecting him to get up so early. It was the sound of the vessels that prompted her to come out to the kitchen. It was a strange sight for her, he was making tea. She offered her help, but he refused. She went back to the room with out showing out her surprise. It was only a few minutes back she wished if some body had come to her with a cup of tea as the thought was so dry. Right now her own son is making tea in the kitchen on a Sunday morning.

The old age has weekend her knees. Even standing for a short period hurts the knees and in the mornings it is really bad. She often ignored her pain to make tea for her son. In the previous night she had mentioned to him about the knee pain and tiredness due to the old age and how the rest of the people in the house should lend her a helping hand in the house holds. But she had not expected it to have a quick affect.

He came out of the kitchen with two cups of tea. The joy was over flowing in her mind... then suddenly she heard the shout from his room ... HONEYYyy... It was his newlywed wife   'Yes, it is ready I am coming..." he shouted back. He sped up the walk and went past his mom. She felt the joy quickly settling down way below her feet.

Muslims Celebrating Onam

When I called up my friend on last Thursday, he was shopping at one of the popular Malayalee super markets with his family. According to him, the super market had the best fresh vegetables in town. He was picking up vegetables for the 'Onam (Hindu festival) Sadhya (feast)' he was planning at his home next day. No, he is not a Hindu, but a Muslim.

Same day a Muslim colleague of mine had told me how he was going to celebrate 'Onam' on Friday.

Yesterday when I logged in to my facebook account I saw a few pictures posted by my cosine which were apparently taken at the Onam celebrations he had with his Hindu friends. To my surprise, in the pictures he was wearing the Onam traditional dress and spreading the traditional onam flower carpet besides the lighted up Hindu worship lamps.

Today morning another Muslim colleague of mine told me how he celebrated the Onam this time and made up for 3-4 previous missing Onams which he was not able to celebrate due to the reason that it fell in the month of Ramadan.

I am sure there were many more similar stories out there. You my click on the following wikipedia link http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Onam to understand about Onam festival and the belief behind.

Though it is a pure Hindu festival it has been promoted and taught (especially at the schools) as the festival of Malayalees of all religion. But to all my Muslim brothers and sister who keep the similar views, I would like to mention that you are committing a serious sin, the sin which does not stand any chance of forgiveness from Allah(unless you repent sincerely and never commit it again). If you want to show the love for your non Muslim friends, do it by passing them the message of 'Lailaha Illahlla' and not by participating in their religion and customs. If any of you are worried about the displeasure of the people when you turn down their invitation to join their celebrations, be aware that Allah's displeasure is much verse than that. Convince them that it is not personal, it is about love for Allah the adherence to his laws. Tell them that you would not do anything against Allah and the teachings of Prophet (pbuh) even if the insistence comes your own parents though the love and respect for parents taught in length in Islam.

You must have heard about the following hadeeth many a time. Abdullah ibn Umar narrated that Muhammad (pbuh) said,
"Whoever imitates a people(of other religion), then he is one of them." Please try to under stand the seriousness of it. Don't love anyone more than Allah and the prophet (pbuh)

Following is in extract from www.islamqa.com


Imitating or resembling the People of the Book (Jews and Christians) and others with regard to worldly matters is permissible only when the following conditions are met:

1 – That should not be any of their traditions or rituals by which they are distinguished.

2 – That should not be part of their religion. A matter can be proven to be part of their religion though a trustworthy source, such as an aayah of the Qur’aan or a hadeeth of His Messenger, or via well-established reports, such as the prostration of greeting which was permitted to the previous nations.

3 – That should not be anything in Islam which refers specifically to that matter. If there is a specific reference in Islam, either approving or disapproving of it, then we must follow what our religion says about it.

4 – This resemblance should not lead to going against any of the commands of sharee’ah.

5 – That should not involve celebrating any of their festivals.

6 – The resemblance should be only according to what is needed, and no more.

Sai Baba - The con man is dead

The demon faced con man died. He possessed nothing more than the skill of a street magician. He combined his magical and managerial skills to con the world to build an empire worth $9 billion. In 2004, BBC exposed him in their program called 'The secret swami'. They exposed his cheap tricks and sexual exploitations. They established his mafia links. Some medias exposed the murders in his ashram(more precisely in his bedroom) and his own behavioral disorders. But his blind devotees just ignored and rejected all of them. From top scientists to top bureaucrats and politicians queued in front of his ashram awaiting the turn to fall on his feet. Baba's trust secretary K Chakravarthi who is a former Indian Administrative Service (IAS) official, when he assumed the job would have thought 'baba' would be the quickest way to amass wealth.

Two days back when the official report came that his heart was struggling to beat (read it as dead few days back), the former Director General of Police of Andra Pradesh told the media stationed outside his hospital that Sai Baba was God indeed and he would not die until he turned 96 as Baba predicted to the world. Now he is dead but his followers are awaiting his next avatar which sure will come in thousands in this 'Maha...bharat'. In India con men (or women) have legal channel which is divinity, and the whole system of the country support that. I have never felt so ashamed of my nationality, but feeling so superior as the believer of the true God. Alhamdu Lillah(praise to Allah).

'There is not God but Allah and Prophet Muhammad peace be upon was his messenger'

Joseph's Car -A short story based on a real story toled by my dad

Mr. Joseph was the only Malayalee (popularly known as Malabaree in UAE) who was having a car in his office. Holding a UAE license and owning a car were big deal among Malyaliees during those days (I am talking about the late 70s), so it earned him some admiration and envy from among  his friends. He had no problem in helping his fellow mallu colleagues who used to live close by his residents, in commuting to office and back. He not only helped his friends to commute to office but always took one or more along with him when ever he went out in his car. Good hearted!.. Yes!, not Joseph but the ones who used to ride with him. It was not that Joseph loved helping, or the company of people, but he wanted their help when ever the car stopped on the way, and his car used to stop in the mid ways very often. The car that he was driving was an old Toyota car which had far exceeded it's life line and always needed a manual push to start. It was because of this reason, some of his colleagues used to hesitate to accept his offer to drop home, though they all enjoyed the car rides (in a good car) other wise.

Soon Joseph's status as a 'car owner' changed to 'crap owner'. His car stopped working for good. The 'expert' mechanics gave up on the car and advised him to discard it. But he realized that 'getting rid of a dead elephant was as pain full as maintaining one'. The 1st option with him was to call the municipality to take it away from its resting place, but since it required paying the authority, he did not go with that options and all the other natural options involved money so he did not consider them. If you are wondering why he did not think of selling it to a scrap shop, you should know that that kind of business did not really exist those days. He later came up with a 'well thought' solution to get rid of the car which served him as well all it's previous owners for a few decades. It was to 'dump it in the sea' (Something unimaginable in the present times). For that, his car needed one last help from his colleagues. He was living close to the beach. The plan was to push the car to the sea from an isolated area of the beach. If the police seas the act, he would be in trouble. He and his friends chose a relatively quite time to carry out the operation on a holiday. Shortly they were on their way pushing the car to the destination, but plan did not work well, they spotted cops on the beach from a distance. They decided to stop and wait till the cops leave the place.

His friends thought the time was perfect to make the, not so generous Joseph to spend for them. They had stopped right in frond of an ice cream parlour. They demanded Joseph an ice-cream treat as a token of appreciation for their noble service. Soon they all started enjoying the ice of their favourite flavour except Mr. Joseph, who was in deep a thought. In fact he was counting the accumulating cost of his 'dead elephent'.

Then suddenly a loud sound woke Joseph, the sound was laud enough to wake up any one in nap in one kilometer circle. Joseph and friends quickly came out to see the cause of the sound. They could not believe what they saw, Joseph's car had transformed to a pile of metal. The car had hit by a big SUV. The driver of the SUV who was a local Arab came out of the vehicle. What happened after that gave Joseph's friends a revelation about Joseph. Joseph was 'smarter' than what they all thought he was. Joseph started crying loud like child who just lost his favorite toy. 'Oh my God.... what do I do now.....? I lost my car....huuu ... huuu... 'The Arab tried to apologies but Joseph was not listening. The Arab went back to his car. He picked up his car phone and made a few calls, they heard him mentioning 'Toyota Corolla' in his talk. He came back to Joseph. He offered him a cheque and, with out waiting to see Joseph's reaction he left in his damaged SUV. The amount written on the check was sufficient to buy a brand new Toyota Corolla.

few days passed, the check changed Joseph's life. The way he moved around changed, he  preferred to drive alone.

The One Eyed

What would you do if you come across some body who claims to be God? I know that, being a Muslim you would just ignore him!... What if the claimant can also perform some illusions and tricks? you would still ignore him because he is familiar to you. You hear about these kind of guys very often. They are infamously called God men! and available in plenty in countries like India. Some small time illusions and magic are the skills they use, to make the people fall for them.
But what if you come across somebody who not only claims to be God but also perform extraordinary feats like making the clouds rain at his will... splits a person in to two and bring him back to life...make people who don't follow him starve etc? In all the likely hood, you would believe and follow him! He would be the one eyed Dajjal(Antichrist)! He will perform Illusions and tricks and evils like no other has performed on the face of earth. If you think that your iman (Belief) is too strong to withstand any such tests, you might want to read the following Hadith(teaching) of prophet (peace and blessing be upon him):

"Those who hear about Dajjal should stay far from him. By Allah! A person will approach him thinking him to be a Believer, but on seeing his amazing feats he will become his follower."

It is important for a Muslim to believe in the emergence of Dajjal as it is the One of the major signs of Qiyamah (Doomsday) which is one of the pillars of faith in Islam. We should prepare our self and our kids for the times of Dajjal as his emergence could be any time.

The scene before his arrival

Before the emergence of Dajjal there will be three years of drought.

Where he comes from?

He will emerge between Shaam and Iraq, and his emergence will become known when he is in Isfahaan (province of Iran located in the center of Iran) at a place called Yahudea.

His characteristics

Maseeh-ud-Dajjal will be short  and his legs will be crooked. The hair on his head will be extremely twisted. He will have one eye, while his other eye will be flat. It will be neither deep, nor protruding.There will be a thick fingernail-like object in his left eye. The letters "Kaa" "Faa" "Raa" will appear on his forehead which can be read only by Mu'mineen (Muslims) regardless of them being literate or not. He will have a wheatish complexion.

Who will follow him?

The Yahudis (Jews) of Isfahaan  will be his main followers. Apart from having mainly Yahudi followers, he will have a great number of women followers as well.

His feats and claims

He will claim to be God. He will have with him fire and water, but in reality the fire will be cold water while that what appears to be cold water will in reality be a blazing fire. He will travel the entire world at amazing speed. He will send down rains upon those who believe in him, which in turn will cause good crops to grow, trees to bear fruit and cattle to grow fat. He will cause drought to those who disbelieve in him, resulting in starvation and hardship for them. During those trying times the Mu'mineen(Muslims) will satiate their hunger through the recitation of Subhanallah (Glory be to Allah (God)) and La'ilaha  Ilallahu. (There is no God but Allah). A hidden treasures will spill forth at his command. He will stay on this Earth for a period of forty days; the length of the first day will be one year, the second day will be equal to one month, the third day will be equal to a week and the remaining days  will be normal.

Dajjal's Killing

Prophet Jesus(Peace be upon him) will descend to the white Minaret (Nawwas-b-Samaan/Muslim) in the east of Damascus, wearing two garments died with saffron, placing his hands on the wings of two angels.

The Dajjal on seeing Prophet Jesus (Peace be upon him) among the Muslims will begin to dissolve like salt in water and will begin to flee. Prophet Jesus (Peace be upon him) will say to him, ''You will remain alive until I strike you with my spear, ''He will catch up with him at the Eastern gate of Ludd (Ludd is a mountain in Syria. Some say that it is a village in Jerusalem, and some say that it is a village in Palestine) and then Prophet Jesus(Peace be upon him) will kill him with a small spear.

How do you protect yourself from Dajjal?

Reciting of Surah - Kahf- The recitation of Surah Kahf is a safe guard from the Dajjal's turmoil

Seeking refuge in Allah- Whoever seeks Allah's refuge and protection from Dajjal's fitna(trials) especially in Salah, Inshallah will be protected.

Staying miles apart- When the Dajjal appears one should stay as far away from him as possible.

Safe Haven of Makkah and Madinah- One should try to migrate to Makkah or Madinah, as he will not be able to enter these two holy cities.

Knowledge of  Allah's Attributes- One should seek Islamic knowledge especially knowledge of Allah's attributes. By possessing knowledge of Allah's attributes one will not be misled by the Dajjal.

Further Reading: http://www.inter-Islam.org/faith/Majorsigns.html#dajaal

The Exam

CBSC Class 10 results were out a few days back. My cousin's son got through with 72% mark. The result was excellent for his standards. Cousin was overjoyed, she invited us over to her house for a lunch to celebrate her son's extra ordinary performance. 

She was very nervous and tensed when I spoke to her in the previous night. Though I knew it all, she was narrating all the hardship and pain that she had gone through in preparing her son who has got a casual attitude towards his academics. He attended special tuitions for most of the subjects for two years, some of them were costing as much as AED 70 per hour. My cousin could afford it but what she could not really afford was the ordeal and stress in motivating a de-motivated kid for one of the most important exams of ones life (as the society see it). A below par result would have put her in great depression and the future of her son in uncertainty. But Alhamdu Lillha(All praise is due to Allah) he got through.

Board and University exams are big things in our lives, it stresses the kids as well as the parents. The society perceives that the performance in those exams decide ones future.

My friend and colleague Naveed too talked about an exam on the previous day. He talked about the toughest exam any human being will face in his life and after. Pass mark is nothing short of centum. It  can be called an 'open exam' as the questions and answers are already published and widely circulated. It is an oral exam of three short answer questions. But unlike any other, for this exam you have to prepare with your heart rather than the mind. Brother Naveed was referring to the questions of the grave. The three questions, one will be asked by the angels in the grave, viz; 1, Who is your Lord 2, What is your religion and 3 Who is your prophet.

Who is your Lord?

Allah! 

Allah said in Quran(Chapter 112): Say, "He is Allah , [who is] One, Allah , the Eternal Refuge. He neither begets nor is born, Nor is there to Him any equivalent."

What is your religion?

Islam! 

Allah said in Quran (Chapter 5 verse 3): This day I have perfected for you your religion and completed My favour upon you and have approved for you Islam as religion.

Who is your prophet?

Muhammad (Peace be upon him)!

Allah said in Quran (Chapter 33 verse 40):

Muhammad is not the father of any man among you, but he is the Messenger of ALLAH and the last of the Prophets

So these questions and answers are very simple but answering them at the right time will take living the answers in the life before death. We have to hold on to the Quran and the teachings of the prophet(peace be upon him), whatsoever is the circumstance of our lives.

  

The Reward

So what is the reward of passing this exam?... it is nothing less than The Paradise! 

Allah describes Paradise in Quran (Chapter 2 verse 25): "And give good tidings to those who believe and do righteous deeds that they will have gardens [in Paradise] beneath which rivers flow. Whenever they are provided with a provision of fruit there from, they will say, "This is what we were provided with before." And it is given to them in likeness. And they will have therein purified spouses, and they will abide therein eternally.

The Punishment

Unlike any other exam, you will be punished if you fail, and the punishment of failing this exam is The Hell. 

Allah says in Quran (Chapter9 verse 63): Do they not know that whoever opposes Allah and His Messenger - that for him is the fire of Hell, wherein he will abide eternally? That is the great disgrace.

A Serous Issue

So this exam is a serious one but in spite of knowing the punishment and reward, why are we still not really preparing for it? Why are we not really stressed or worried when we see our kids not preparing for this exam...  Brothers and sisters, we have a serous issue in our hand...